Why the “L” word isn’t such a scary thing anymore

A friend recently posted a writing with the following link in it:


It starts out by talking about the definitions that mainstream society prescribes to the word, “love”, and how those definitions may be constraining to the experience that many of us have and the joy that is available to us through loving others in non-conforming ways. And this got me to thinking, as it really resonates with some stuff that I’ve been feeling in the last several months.

I’ve identified as polyamorous since sometime toward the end of my undergraduate years, but only in the last few have I been exploring it in depth. I’ve been struggling(?) with finding the right word for some of my relationships that doesn’t carry the weight of that word, “love”, but am finding that it really is the most apt there is. Love takes so many shapes and forms, and doesn’t have to be reserved for a forever, in-depth thing. I’m finding myself in love not with just lovers and partners, but with friends, play partners, and people I see twice a year, three times if I’m lucky. Fuck, sometimes I’ll be perhaps overly fond of the girl standing in front of me at the checkout line at the grocery store. Often I will catch myself, while with somebody whose company I enjoy, thinking at them, “I love you.” I’ll then be taken aback for a moment by the perceived gravity of that word, and modify it by thinking, “I love you. In some weird way.” …..

But you know what? It’s not weird, dammit! Fuck that noise!! I’m going to allow myself to have deep feelings for anyone I want, even if it is in passing, even if my connection with them isn’t a romantic relationship. I am allowed to find beauty in the human being sitting next to me, or waiting in a queue with me, or laying on top of me. It doesn’t have to be a forever thing. It doesn’t have to be a live-in, I-want-to-have-your-babies-and-die-in-the-same-nursing-home-as-you kind of thing. I am going to allow myself to live in the present moment with the people I choose to surround myself with. And LOVE the FUCK out of them.

The End. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

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